Hey I'm Rio and I'm in a serious relationship with food.
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aroseforalice:

me and my friends

peekachiu:

when someone steals food from your plate

image

martinfreeman:

catholicamputee:

this was the weirdest movie ever.

shrek 2 was the highest grossing film of 2004 and is the 26th highest grossing film of all time

bullied:

party at my house bring food then leave

evolutional:

if u have perfectly clear skin and u complain about one tiny little blemish i will personally beat u with a shovel 

Anonymous asked: What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

sephyerite:

almanzapedia:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

No mercy.

thelilysparks:

It’s amazing that people will see a kid yelled at or manhandled by a parent and say “It’s not my business, you can’t tell someone how to raise their kid” but if someone lets their son wear a dress it’s a public discussion.

wild-guy:

Kelly Rowland texting Nelly via Microsoft Excel and then getting annoyed when he doesn’t text back.

Confidence is being able to say “Fuck you, I’m the shit” without opening your mouth, say it with your walk, with your smile, say it with your entire being.
Tati-Ana Mercedes  (via gnarly) ←

contra-punt:

Welcome to Britain

  • Patient: how'd the operation go, doc?
  • Doctor: omg check my FAQ pls xoxo